IN MEMORIAM

Subject: elaine died of a massive heart attack on saturday night, april 2, 2011 -right
From: Perry Bezanis perryb@condition.org
Date: Wed, 06 Apr 2011 18:51:56 -0800
To: ...
Elaine died of a massive heart attack on Saturday night, April 2, 2011 -right in front of me sitting opposite her, but it was obvious she was gone.

She had always been in good health, so hadn't really seen a doctor since perhaps 2008 -only this thursday night complaining about ill-feeling in heart/esophagus area -two days til attack, and altho we always communicated well about such things, we trusted each other to make our own decisions.

She decided saturday early evening to go to emergency, but wanted a small a bowl of miso soup, so I made that for her -bean threads, little dried seaweed and a beaten egg; it was while eating that sitting opposite her eating what little was in left in the pot, I looked up and saw her slumped back into her chair, head back, mouth open, arms hanging, eyes upward; I knew she was dead -no breathing -no nothing. I immediately pulled her to the floor; gave her cpr and called 911 -even think I broke two ribs, but there were only two or three maybe four rasps. Ambulance arrived within a few minute -six fireman, and they were fast, but only a few distant spikes on the ekg -and then complete flat-line.

God, I miss a wonderful love and companion -excellent cook too, I could talk her about anything -degree in botany, worked in aerospace too -great sensitivities in the arts and the humanities in general, and a voracious reader; she was at least half of me! -god, I miss her! She supported me in every way; I know nothing about where money comes from or how it moves around -pensions, credit cards, debits, social security, taxes whatever, but she actually understood what I was doing. -god, I really miss her! The house, the yard, it's all her, not me; she's all over the place -completely empty without her, yet I can't do anything here without running into her - another bawl. -I really miss her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Son, Hector, arrived late Sunday Apr 3 -Felix, Wednesday Apr 6 -each staying about 5 days. I had to write the above first chance I had, Monday, Apr 4; neither of them has an input, consequently, but they have read it, and agree completely -and it shows in their dispositions and interests too. Elaine was a great mother even if she sometimes doubted what was best for any and all -naturally but patiently. And we all kept in touch too, always knowing how anyone else was doing; we will miss her.]